Wondering what Mommy Homework is??? Each week you will have an “assignment” here to share in our comments here on this site. You will love this-both sharing AND enjoying answers by others. Some of them, I compile into an ebook (contributors can resell as a product of their own–be sure to submit your email and full name when you register so I can credit you appropriately!).
The result is AWESOME!
We get to know each other…we are encouraged in our journey…and we glean super ideas from other great moms!
Ready for this week’s MH? This is going to be a good one!
This past weekend, I ran my second 5K. I love it! I love everything about running 5Ks. Actually, I am enjoying every one of my weekly runs. It is just “up my alley.”
Last week, as I finished my last run before my 5K, my mind was trailing off. When I am running, my mind just brainstorms like never before. As it was trailing off on one thought, I got stuck on it. I have thought about it all week long. It is the perfect discussion for today’s Mommy Homework. No matter where you are on your journey, this question is FOR YOU!
I was thinking about MY PACE. I have found that when I run, I have a pace that is JUST MINE right now. If I run in that pace, I can run my whole distance pretty easily. It is relaxing. It is doable for the long-haul. Of course, if I get faster, things get real tough–I get shin splints, my breathing is harder, and I start to feel those old strains in places where I have had injuries in the past. I am up-down-all around with my pace–slow, slow slow one moment and running faster than ever another moment. I do not have the stamina or endurance for the whole distance. It is crazy! Of course, running slower is very similar. Isn’t that odd? There is A SPOT that is just right for me. When I get in the rhythm, I can do it!
Ok, here is where I am going. I was thinking about how much my whole life is like running. I have a certain pace of life that is just my “sweet spot.” I am amazed at how much better life is when I am in that zone. It is amazing how much more I get done…how much more stamina I have… and how much easier things are. When I get to “pushing it,” things really start to get messy, exhausting, out of order. It doesn’t take long, I begin to shut down–even though I could normally balance all of that AND more. The only difference is MY PACE.
And, it is in every area of my life! My relationship with God. My marriage. My relationship with my children. Homemaking. Home business. Ministry. EVERYTHING!
Relate?
Let’s talk about this topic…
1. Ever noticed how your pace affects everything? Where does it show in your life?
2. What gets you off your pace–rushing it and pushing it OR going too slow?
3. What do you do to keep on YOUR PACE? OR, what should you do to keep moving forward at YOUR PACE?
Dig in. Share your heart. Oh! I am excited about this “discussion!” Have fun! 
DIG IN!
Love ya!
Cindy
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Deadline–Friday at midnight CST.
I’ll be honest here. I do not LIKE to get up early. I’d rather stay up late and sleep in a bit. Lately, I haven’t felt well lately and I have migraines, so mornings are often rough for me. But if I give in to the sluggish feeling and lay in bed a bit late, I feel like I am running behind all day. If I get up before the kids (instead of letting them wake me up) and go downstairs DRESSED, I do much better. Maybe getting dressed sounds simple to you, but with six kids to get dressed, I can often get them taken care of (well, four of them need help) and then I wind up downstairs in my sweats, breakfast, clean up, schoolwork…and suddenly it is lunchtime or later before I look into a mirror and realize I haven’t gotten ready yet!
My best mornings are those when I can fix a cup of tea and sit in my rocker and read my devotion BEFORE the kids are up. If I can take the time to plan, or already have a plan written out, things go much more smoothly and I stay on pace. Even the simplest of things, like having a menu AND the items I need to prepare it in the cupboard, help make things run better. It eliminates emergency runs to the store or substitutions, saves time, and helps avoid arguments (our 18 yo would love to have steak every night…lol).
I definitely think the kids wind up having a better day on those days when I have a plan and follow it. I certainly feel like they get more attention and have a fuller experience. My husband is military and is gone a lot, or works late, so that can throw things off kilter. When he is home, having a family meal winds things down quite nicely, then he puts them to bed and tells them a story. On those nights I am grateful that I do not have to do everything and be everything for the kids. Then I get to tidy up and leave things spic and span for the next day. THAT is a BIG one. Getting up in the morning to a sink full of dishes is absolutely HORRIBLE and definitely makes you feel behind your pace.
It’s hard for me to get to bed at a reasonable hour because I am such a night owl (and I so enjoy those quiet hours where I can get things done), but going to bed at a reasonable time (for me that means before midnight) is important, or the next day will be sluggish. Writing in my journal, then praying, generally helps me wrap up the day and feel like things are all taken care of and off my plate. It’s a good ending to the race.
Wow, this is a hard one. Pace affects everyone and everything around you. In my house it’s mainly my children. There are some days that my pace is just dog-tired and blah. I tell you what, on these days I can really see how it affects everyone in the whole household. In fact, I’m taking a breather right now from my disobedient 12 year old dear son. I looked at this question this morning and haven’t had a chance to reread it. If my pace is slow and not “up to par” with what needs to be done, it seems like everyone else’s day is just blah and there seems to be more of a pulling/tugging/arguing day. If this kind of day starts out, it seems like it’s a constant struggle for everyone in the household.
Many times it’s life/health that gets us off pace. I’ve had many health problems over the past 2 years. It started out 2 years ago with carpal tunnel. I had surgeries on both hands at the beginning of last year. As soon as they started really healing and I started feeling better my feet “decided” to go bad-with plantar faciitis. Well, I’m getting ready for surgery next week on one of my feet to get this fixed. On all days (esp. my bad days)I start out with prayer before leaving my bed. Then I try and start out with praise and worship music on the radio. It seems to uplift everyone and keeps us going. Praising and worshiping our wonderful Creator! But, when I cannot do things that I was planning on doing, then we seem to hit a wall yet again.
One thing that I work hard on doing is to have the kitchen sink clean at night before bed, dishes in the dishwasher, and have that running. In the morning I have the kids unload it IMMEDIATELY so that the days’ dishes can have a home in there, then when dad comes home for supper, the kitchen looks semi-respectable, he’s in a better mood, which spreads throughout the whole family! I also have tried cleaning off the counter and the table every night. This does not always get done, though. I do see a HUGE difference in the mood swings of everyone if it’s at least half-way tidy.
To keep up with my pace that I’ve set for myself I have a piece of paper that I write down everything that I’d like to accomplish that day. EVERYTHING. Down to my praying, Bible reading, & vitamins. Seeing things crossed off throughout the day gives me a HUGE sense of accomplishment. At the end of the day most things are crossed off and I just feel so proud and happy (and sometimes too excited, maybe…) that I’m doing what I wanted to/needed to do. Becoming more like Jesus and doing what I know that He wants me to do. Also, I have my sister that really holds me accountable for my actions. We talk daily and if I’m having a bad day she gives me that encouragement that I need to finish up the day. If I really cannot finish up my list she tells me that I did a good job and I did what I could that day. Tomorrow is another day, another fresh new start. I do the same for her. I love talking with her and encouraging her, esp. on those “bad, hairy days” that we all have.
I try to remember that each day is a blessing from God and my slate is wiped clean. I can do what He needs me to do, but only if I’m ready, receptive, and willing. I am a stubborn one at times, rebellious, and not perfect. I just have to remember to ask God to guide my day, to bless our home, bless our homeschool, bless my family, and bless everything to the glory of God. When I do not do this, I can tell. Seriously. God says that we receive not because we ask not. If we are in His will, we will ask for the things that are needed. He knows what is best for us and what is best to accomplish His will. I’m thankful to have an awesome, loving, wonderful Father like him!
Right now, I am still trying to find my pace after so much upheaval. It amazes me how much chaos a new baby plus cross country move can affect you. We’ve been in our new house 2 months and I still have boxes about.
Prior to all this upheaval, I did see that when I had just the right balance of obligations and managed my life well, then things just flowed. Anything from one extra obligation, an illness, less than optimal sleep, to an unhealthy diet can thrown me off pace and make it all seem like more than I can handle.
I’ve also found that our pace for homeschool work is seriously affected by outside ‘influences’. I know that we are struggling as a family with the chaos still around the house, adjusting to new sleep schedules and the longer days here in Alaska, and just having been out of the ‘habit’. High atop the list of things that NEED to happen is beginning our day with prayer. I can see a huge difference between those days when we do not start off our day in prayer with those that do.
Knowing that we are NOT working at an ideal pace, I am tackling the problem head on. In the next few months, the house HAS to be placed into order. I can’t get some of my work done seeing chaos about and shouldn’t expect the rest of the family to function well when things are not all in their place. We are also going to set up a more formal family devotional with dedicated space for what we need. Obligations for everyone will be written down with only ONE calendar to record things so no one can easily double book. And, finally, we are going to get back into a healthier lifestyle so that our bodies can function well. This includes diet, exercise, sleep and modifying the home environment (good-bye to some old carpet!)
Laura O’Neill
This one is hard for me as there has been no steady pace for 3 years in our home.
To correct it recently I have been getting up early to walk and then have quiet time with a cup of tea when I return home. this is before my husband leaves at 7am.
I have started using routines to keep the house picked up and presentable.
I have begun to do certain chores on certain days too to keep up with general life.
When I do take a day off for a field trip or to visit friends then catch up is done on a day to day basis.
This year I have been a reviewer for a Homeschool company and it has caused disruption in these routines too, as staying up late caused me to wake up late.
when I figure out the night before what exactly needs to be accomplished then I make a plan in my head. I go through the next day bit by bit adjusting where I need to. Due to depression of a mild sort, I am slowing down, taking naps when needed, and starting to think about the fuel my body needs to keep pace with what is expected of me as a mom and wife.
My walking helps me calm down and do deep breathing which was advised by my counsellor too. When I am excercising , eating right and sleeping enough hours each night the rest does seem to fall into place.
My time with the Lord is beginning to get more exciting too as I allow him time to speak to me instead of just reading my verses for the day and closing the Word. i need HIm to speak to me, and get my ‘nutrition’ for the day.
thanks – Julie Knight
The Ladies above are right. I have also noticed that my pace changes along with the different seasons of my life.
Like I am at a crawl almost when the kids are babies. We don’t get much done daily, math, spelling and the rest of the schooly stuff doesn’t get finished. I’m up most of the night and sleep in really late.
If I’m sick then I can’t get anything done and the kids are affected by it to. DH comes home to a mess and gets cranky.
Right now I have noticed I need some time in the AM to talk to God- He hasn’t been talking to me much, I probably need to shut up to hear him. HAHAHA- and then exercise. If I have those things done then I can keep up. I wasn’t feeling well a few days ago and didn’t get those done until late in the AM and I was falling behind all day long. The kids were falling behind too, as if they said Mom isn’t doing what she should be doing. I’m not going to either. My baby is 2 1/2 now and sleeps all night, so I can do this now, I couldn’t last year or the year before when she was still waking up at night for feedings.
I think also that when I stop trying to do what I thing needs to be done and make the time to do what God wants me to do, makes the biggest difference
I have tried writing something like a To Do list the night before or even in the AM but they never work for me. I always feel so discouraged when I don’t get everything done.
I hope I made sense….my brain isn’t working well today.
MariaR
Wow, what a topic. I find also that if I can begin my day quietly-a cup of coffee and my time with the Lord, makes my day go so much smoother. I try to do as much as possible before everyone is up and the race for the day begins (quiet time, check my e-mails, go over my lesson plans for the day, etc.). This helps keep me on track and sets the tone of my day, which definitely sets the tone for my family’s day!
When I think of life as “running a race”, I think back to the scripture when Paul talks about that. I actually did a teaching on that for our youth group over a year ago, and it helped me think of my daily life as running a race. Then, I did a study on how athletes trained to ready themselves. They prepared and equipped themselves-they endured pain to reach their goals. I know I need to be prepared-to get before the Lord and see what HE wants for us to accomplish, for His wisdom, etc. Then, I feel more confident as I write out those plans-there is hope for it all to be completed. It is not always easy or convenient to keep at it, but I have a plan from the Lord, not me. However, many times plans are disrupted, put on hold, etc., by our daily life(sickness, sickness of extended family, church ministry, etc. I have found that my attitude towards this makes all the difference. How do I handle the many things that can creep in and change my plans-do I get grumpy, or do I endure w/a good attitude and the Lord’s peace?
We also struggle w/many days of someone not feeling well, as I have a child with asthma and another that struggles constantly w/allergies and migraines, and I also battle the migraines, especially when I don’t get enough rest (since we have hit that menopausal stage, it seems to be a lot of sleepless nights-more headaches). So, I have learned to keep seeking for God’s plans, and take it one day at a time-to listen for the Lord-do we need to change things, or endure the way we are going. The hardest part for me is learning when to let go and be okay w/changing my plans, and when to stick it out and keep going, when things are really tough. I try to keep peace and not stress anymore, when we have a day that no one feels well, or something comes up and puts our schoolwork on hold for that day. We make it up throughout the week, or some things we can let go, and fill in w/a hands-on training, etc. As my kids have grown older, this has gotten easier, and they are much more peaceful when mom is (ha). When they were smaller, and things got tense, or just a bad day-we would stop and go take a nice walk outdoors, or put on some praise music and let them dance around. This changed the atmosphere of the entire home. This time of year (we are having a beautiful spring), it helps to open the windows-once the pollen is gone, or to take an afternoon stroll, to clear our minds, it also seems to give me some extra energy for the afternoon. Then, I sit and have a nice cup of hot tea as I sit to review their work for the day, or see what is left for us to accomplish. I let them all take a break in the afternoon-whether to just sit and read, or sit outside in the sun, etc. Then they are all ready to finish up for the afternoon, whether it is schoolwork, music, or helping/preparing the evening meal, etc. It’s the simple things that help keep us going. Then, when we hit a hard spot, and it seems I’m struggling w/them for a couple of days or more, I plan an activity to get us out (such as a “field trip”, family day, or just going to sit at Barnes & Noble w/a cup of tea or coffee), especially during the dreary, cold, winter days. This seems to help us get rid of those “blue” days and put us back on track also-to keep running that race!
I think my biggest issue is working with the hand I am dealt. I was on target this school year to start the week of Labor Day. I even had the Saturday before Labor Day to finish up the last minute details. However, that wasn’t God’s plan for my year.
My sister has had complications with a weight loss surgery she had in 2000. That Saturday morning we got the call that she was septic and very near death. Needless to say, we drove all day and night to get to MA to see her. I spent 2 weeks there in Sept. and 2 weeks in Nov. This definitely changed my pace for my year.
Every year at about the middle point, I feel like I am not doing enough, but when I get to the end, I see that the Lord worked everything out and we really had a great year. Even with the upset with my sister and her situation, which still isn’t much better at this point, we did accomplish at lot of great things.
Procrastination is also a big problem for me. When I work at a pace where I am on top of things and not letting everything go by the wayside, days go so much smoother. That is not the case most of the time. What happens more often than not, is me grading papers on Sunday night and doing lesson plans the same day. My husband is a blessing and gives me time without the children, so that I can get things done. That helps out alot.
Definitely, being in God’s word on a daily basis is the best thing to do. Allowing Him to speak to me especially in the morning, gives me a better plan and pace for each day.